Success!

Awesome!...
After using wood glue between the driver chip and the adapter, bending (and smashing) the pins down, and then just straight-up pushing the chip down with my finger, I was finally able to get the driver chip to completely contact the adapter.
Check out this wonderful, sophisticated setup:



After tweaking with the code some, I was able to get the LEDs to blink. Unfortunately, all attempts to get them to blink independently failed miserably.
Another picture of the LEDs (all 3 of them) while on:



And finally, a small QuickTime video of the pulsing that I coded them up to do (slowed down quite a bit to get a more-visible effect).